Mom up at 3am, confused, woke me up. Started in at 7am, thinking she was somewhere else and had to be picked up. I can't take much more of this, it is so draining and NO ONE is helping. I am full of despair!
Caregiver D. has been so good to us; I've learned a lot from her. Also learned that she had a cleaning gig near here on weekends! The truth always comes out!!!
Friday, August 13, 2010
Monday, August 9, 2010
Losing the Caregiver
Caregiver says the post office hired her, wow! Called Hector for another list of workers. This ordeal has turned me into a fighter!
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Relief from a Friend!
A coworker's daughter stays w/Mom all day! Yay! I feel such RELIEF! Knowing Mom was happy and cared for all day, thank God!
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
When the Caregiver No Longer Cares for You...
I am at my wit's end!!!
Yesterday I get a phone call at work from my apt manager, saying my mom was outside and said to Martine that she didn't know where she was. He ran to James the manager who called me at work. Oh my God, another nightmare coming true!
So I go home and it's bad. This disease is not only claiming my mom, but me as well. I go to bed anxious and exhausted, but I wake up with anxiety attacks, unable to breathe, etc. I am at wit's end!
So I tell my mom all will be well, she's not going to be alone, Darlene the caregiver will be by today. "When?" she demands, "At 5 o'clock? The day's over by then!" I say I know but it's the best I can do right now. Then she asks me to take her to Alyce's, and I have to tell her I can't do that. She asks why, doesn't she want me either? Oh man. Yeah I say, something like that.
So I text the caregiver, asking if she can come early today please? She has another client that takes up a lot of her time, she says. I get this text in reply, "Oh boy there's a problem. There are no hours according to payroll, I been on the phone with them." Oh good God! When will the problems END with this woman? It's always something! And today of ALL days, she's pulling this? It took my mom nearly two months to be reapproved for Medi-Cal, during which time her in home support never stopped. She is being reassessed this week, and the social worker said until reassessment my mom has no hours however Darlene the caregiver DOES have hours to care for her, and will be paid!!!
This woman just doesn't want to work for us anymore. How coincidental that she said she wants to cut back on to working two nights a week instead of five since her other client got out of the hospital but she won't leave me hanging, then she does that very thing. Says to me "can you guarantee I'm going to get paid?" Well yes I can, it all works out, but what NERVE!
So I have to take the day off to be with my mom. Thank God for my job and my supervisor!!! I am told perhaps I can make up some hours later that I missed. Supervisor at the Banning office Lydia tells me that even though hours have ended for a client (only because reassessment is coming right up) that doesn't mean Darlene would not have been paid, they still owe her whatever she works. But she won't come out until she hears from a social worker she's going to be paid.
Bottom line is that she didn't believe ME, and took the opportunity to be with her 'other lady' who she prefers to be with anyway. I feel that Darlene knew she could be paid but chose to screw me over, not to mention my mom. After awhile I needed to lay down and just be quiet, and she called me but I didn't take it, because it would have disturbed Mom as well. It was such a bad day! Then she (Darlene) sends me this text message: "So r u angry at me now? R u home now?" You dumb broad of COURSE I am home!!! Angry? Yes and no. She said to me, "I think I've been pretty lenient here." Yeah well so have I, and you don't even know what I know.
Like the time my mom was flipping out, and she said she was "running late" and then I told her I was getting off at six pm instead of at 8pm. Mom still had no one. She sent me a text saying she didn't come by because I said I was getting off at sixpm! On my way home I drove by the rehab place where her other lady was at the time, and her car was there! So she could've stopped in on my mom, gotten PAID for that, instead of going to the rehab place that she Doesn't get paid for!
I hate to say this, but my sister was right about her. She told me that she felt she was very cunning, not to be trusted, and she didn't like how she was treating Mom. I never forgot what she said, even though I deplored the way she said it. Sigh....I am so tired.
I'm off today and Alex offered to be with Mom. It's so nice to have someone here who I trust and doesn't have issues! She's on time and seems to enjoy her. I have warned her it's a draining job, but so far she doesn't seem put off. What a great young lady she is!
So parting shot from Darlene last night (after I asked her has she not gotten paid for my mom and I don't know what else to say), via text: All I know is I shouldn't have to call to beg to be paid. My last check not the one that is lost but first of July was shorted. They took union dues out and medical prem for insurance that they took from me. And I will be talking to payroll again in am about telling what I got and did not get paid. Because they don't have a right to talk about my finances. Thank you for letting me know that.l If I had the $ I should take a lawsuit out on the county."
Me and my big mouth, telling her that payroll told me she had been paid. It's not my problem!!! She makes it out like it's OUR fault. Or that's how I feel, with all this complaining! Fact is, she's behind the 8 ball because her other lady was in the hospital for a month, and she didn't get paid for her. None of this is my mom's fault and I am so tired of it all.
Our other caregiver had zero problems getting paid!
Yesterday I get a phone call at work from my apt manager, saying my mom was outside and said to Martine that she didn't know where she was. He ran to James the manager who called me at work. Oh my God, another nightmare coming true!
So I go home and it's bad. This disease is not only claiming my mom, but me as well. I go to bed anxious and exhausted, but I wake up with anxiety attacks, unable to breathe, etc. I am at wit's end!
So I tell my mom all will be well, she's not going to be alone, Darlene the caregiver will be by today. "When?" she demands, "At 5 o'clock? The day's over by then!" I say I know but it's the best I can do right now. Then she asks me to take her to Alyce's, and I have to tell her I can't do that. She asks why, doesn't she want me either? Oh man. Yeah I say, something like that.
So I text the caregiver, asking if she can come early today please? She has another client that takes up a lot of her time, she says. I get this text in reply, "Oh boy there's a problem. There are no hours according to payroll, I been on the phone with them." Oh good God! When will the problems END with this woman? It's always something! And today of ALL days, she's pulling this? It took my mom nearly two months to be reapproved for Medi-Cal, during which time her in home support never stopped. She is being reassessed this week, and the social worker said until reassessment my mom has no hours however Darlene the caregiver DOES have hours to care for her, and will be paid!!!
This woman just doesn't want to work for us anymore. How coincidental that she said she wants to cut back on to working two nights a week instead of five since her other client got out of the hospital but she won't leave me hanging, then she does that very thing. Says to me "can you guarantee I'm going to get paid?" Well yes I can, it all works out, but what NERVE!
So I have to take the day off to be with my mom. Thank God for my job and my supervisor!!! I am told perhaps I can make up some hours later that I missed. Supervisor at the Banning office Lydia tells me that even though hours have ended for a client (only because reassessment is coming right up) that doesn't mean Darlene would not have been paid, they still owe her whatever she works. But she won't come out until she hears from a social worker she's going to be paid.
Bottom line is that she didn't believe ME, and took the opportunity to be with her 'other lady' who she prefers to be with anyway. I feel that Darlene knew she could be paid but chose to screw me over, not to mention my mom. After awhile I needed to lay down and just be quiet, and she called me but I didn't take it, because it would have disturbed Mom as well. It was such a bad day! Then she (Darlene) sends me this text message: "So r u angry at me now? R u home now?" You dumb broad of COURSE I am home!!! Angry? Yes and no. She said to me, "I think I've been pretty lenient here." Yeah well so have I, and you don't even know what I know.
Like the time my mom was flipping out, and she said she was "running late" and then I told her I was getting off at six pm instead of at 8pm. Mom still had no one. She sent me a text saying she didn't come by because I said I was getting off at sixpm! On my way home I drove by the rehab place where her other lady was at the time, and her car was there! So she could've stopped in on my mom, gotten PAID for that, instead of going to the rehab place that she Doesn't get paid for!
I hate to say this, but my sister was right about her. She told me that she felt she was very cunning, not to be trusted, and she didn't like how she was treating Mom. I never forgot what she said, even though I deplored the way she said it. Sigh....I am so tired.
I'm off today and Alex offered to be with Mom. It's so nice to have someone here who I trust and doesn't have issues! She's on time and seems to enjoy her. I have warned her it's a draining job, but so far she doesn't seem put off. What a great young lady she is!
So parting shot from Darlene last night (after I asked her has she not gotten paid for my mom and I don't know what else to say), via text: All I know is I shouldn't have to call to beg to be paid. My last check not the one that is lost but first of July was shorted. They took union dues out and medical prem for insurance that they took from me. And I will be talking to payroll again in am about telling what I got and did not get paid. Because they don't have a right to talk about my finances. Thank you for letting me know that.l If I had the $ I should take a lawsuit out on the county."
Me and my big mouth, telling her that payroll told me she had been paid. It's not my problem!!! She makes it out like it's OUR fault. Or that's how I feel, with all this complaining! Fact is, she's behind the 8 ball because her other lady was in the hospital for a month, and she didn't get paid for her. None of this is my mom's fault and I am so tired of it all.
Our other caregiver had zero problems getting paid!
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